It’s tough out there for software development managers. The job is not easy. Managing people is hard enough, but managing people with technical skills who do work that is very difficult to measure is truly challenging. 

I’ve done it. And while I can’t claim to be some kind of super-manager, I can claim to have learned a few difficult truths along the way. Some of them are about managing people in general, and some are about managing developers in particular. 

Here are six hard-won insights that might prove useful to you if you find yourself the boss of a development team.

Your presence changes everything

This is often difficult for managers to comprehend. The fact that you are in the room or on a Zoom call with your subordinates has a significant impact on everyone present. Everyone behaves differently when the boss is around. Everyone. And you, as a boss, need to realize this. There are two things to realize here. Firstly, when you are present, people will change who they are and what they say. Secondly, you should consider that fact when deciding whether to be in the room.

It might just be that your presence will suppress the free flow of ideas. Maybe a good idea that needs refining without you there will never be voiced. Maybe people will be hesitant to disagree with your bad idea. You need to be aware of all the subtleties that may or may not happen because you are there.

People will take what you say seriously

Bosses need to realize that what they say, even comments that you might think are flippant and not meant to be taken seriously, will be taken seriously. I have seen entire projects started and completed based on an offhand comment the boss made in a meeting. She was shocked to discover that what she thought was a crazy, casual idea was taken seriously. I’ve seen policies written and followed based on similar situations.

Small compliments can make someone’s day or week. Small negative comments can ruin a day or even send someone into a tailspin. Be careful what you say around your subordinates—they just might believe you.

Your silence will speak volumes

The other side of that coin is that your silence and non-action can have profound effects. Maybe you space out in a meeting and miss a question. The team might think you blew them off and left the great idea hanging. Maybe you forgot to answer an email. Maybe you had bigger fish to fry and you were a bit short and dismissive of an approach by a direct report. Small lapses can be easily misconstrued by your team. 

Failing to praise good work can be discouraging. Failing to comment on sub-par work can perpetuate it. Your words, and your lack of words, have power. Be careful about what you don’t say around your team—they just might fill the void with wild conclusions.

Everyone will be a little afraid of you

You are the boss. You have the power to promote, demote, and award raises and bonuses. These powers are important, and people will see you in that light. Even your best attempts at being cordial, friendly, and collegial will not overcome the slight apprehension your authority will engender. Your mood on any given day will be noticed and tracked. 

Your technical skills don’t matter as much as you’d like

Sure, you are a manager because you were a great programmer and you wanted more responsibility. But you aren’t being paid to code anymore. That’s what your team is paid to do, so you should let them do it.

You can and should have input into technical decisions and design decisions, but your team will want to be the ones driving what direction things take and how things get done. If you constantly make all the decisions, you will suck all the oxygen out of the room. Your job is no longer to write the best code and design the perfect system; it’s to create the environment where your people can do that.

Your people will want to feel empowered to do the work and set the direction. Let them. 

There is nothing you can do about all this

Perhaps the hardest thing to accept here is that you can’t do anything about any of this—that all these truths will impact you despite your best efforts. You can’t be in the room and not be in the room. You can’t say things without your words having some meaning that you might not intend. You can no longer be the technical lead. No matter how hard you might try to be liked and respected and collegial, the team will still view you with a modicum of fear and apprehension. 

Try as you might, you can’t stop being a manager. In the end, managing developers isn’t about code or process. It’s about understanding the invisible weight of your presence, your words, and your silence.